gold{mari}gold

update

2011-10-28T09:07:00.000+11:00

hello! what a busy last couple of week! and i find myself with a moment of time and felt the need to write a few lines.......so what have we been up to?

i turned twenty nine. mum visited for 4 weeks and it was amazing. not one barney! not one! had a few too many hangovers (with a live in babysitter, going out was sometimes too tempting!). we have hung out at the pool. done LOADS of packing. Lottie is now standing (holy meatballs!) and she has so many new party tricks! lots of park playing and picnics. visiting the public baths every day of last week. enjoying our fave cafe at the moment kitschen pantry (pictured above - if we sit outside, LP can look at dogs and dig in the dirt whilst I attempt to drink my coffee).

what i didn't get much done of was crafting. I found having my sewing machine sitting on the table was creating a bit of pressure and I didn't like that feeling at all! So, like I did with my blog - I packed her away and just enjoyed living in the moment. I feel like I made the right choice. I will have a lot more 'alone' time once we move to Perth as I just don't have the network of stay at home mamas to play with that I do here so I thought better to enjoy them (and mum) whilst we still live in the vicinity.

lots of emotions are swirling. I will write about them as they come to me. Needing a place to get them out and here is as good as any! I realised I've been purposefully trying to deny any feelings about leaving - with a small baby its easy to ignore the future and just live day to day. But as our departure date (nov 12) looms it becomes more apparent that I can't block it out. Tears have been coming thick and fast and I've just got to go with it!

we have also been sent photographs of the place we are most likely going to be living. It is massive compared to our melbourne 2 bedrooms (3 bedrooms with massive kitchen and two living rooms) but it is going to need a lot of TLC. It even has lime green laminex in the kitchen! hahahaha. Anyway - we will inspect when we arrive and take it from there. Kee is an electrician and my Dad is a carpenter/painter so I feel that all will be well.

It will be so different from where we currently live. So close to the city - such a small, urban community. Where we are headed is definitely a lower socio-economic area but our place is next to a large park with great play equipment and 10 minutes from the beach. And - now its time to put our money where our mouth is - we always say we embrace a diverse community so now is the time to prove it!

hope you are all well out there! I have missed your friendly faces, notes and thoughts!

{break in transmission}

2011-10-10T11:16:00.002+11:00

Since Poppy died I haven't felt the need to blog. Through my time as a blogger I have gone through bouts of wondering "why blog" and always returned with ferver. But as we approach this crazy time - walking, toddlerhood, moving interstate, change of EVERYTHING - i feel like i need to concentrate on living. appreciating what I have left of where I live and the amazing life we have built around ourselves.

it is incredibly emotional to think about leaving this house. my child was born into it. not to mention the amazing dinner parties. the loungeroom conversion into a killer dancefloor. this neighbourhood has been our lifeline when it felt like we were trapped in an endless bubble with a newborn. now it seems fitting that as we start to spread our wings, so too, we shed our current little coccoon.

so it will be rather quiet around here. i have LOVED the solidarity i have been so lucky to have built up with many of you. it has kept me company when i felt lonelier than ever before. it has inspired me. made me feel like this world is a grand old place!

but now its time to focus on everything that lay in front of me today and in the near future. I even deleted my facebook account! I will of course keep reading along and peeping into your lives as you have new stories to share. and most importantly, will reconnect when the time is right! my blog may even begin its fourth rebirth!

i would DEARLY love to connect with those that live on the west coast. its a scary thing leaving my mamas here and it will feel so nice to know I have some fellow ladies out there who 'understand'.

so take care all.....much love to you, your families and little ones. can't wait to see you on the other side of all of this crazy, hectic hard work we have in front of us!

xxx

RIP Bomber Lancaster

2011-09-22T09:06:00.002+10:00

Living with Pop was like living with a Legend. Although it was hard to tell whether he WAS an actual Legend or whether it was all talk and he lead you to believe he was a legend. When I was little I thought everyone knew my Pop and that no matter what you were after - meat, new tyres, a car? Pop knew a bloke who owed him a favour and would give you a discount. I grew up thinking that everything literally fell off the back of a truck.

Pop gave us the backbone on which we built our childhood. Uduc Road was heaven to us kids. So much naughty stuff to get up to - the thrill of it increased by the thought of Pop catching us. Nan would let us run wild - hiding in gallon drums filled with chook feed, climbing the shed, eating dog biscuits, skidding along the moss in the fernery, using big syringes from the vet clinic to squirt the little cousins whilst atop the shade house. Then word would get out. Pop was home and he sure was grumpy! You would skidaddle as quickly as you could. Assuming your positions of 'seen and not heard' lest you be given a good old clip around the ear 'ole. Pop would sit down in his Rock Rock, white pepper laden roast on his side table with Sale of the Century at volume 50. We all knew better than to play up during that time or suffer the wroth!

Over time Pop mellowed a little - he was still King of the Roost - but after Nan got sick, Pop became much more demonstrative of his love for her and the pride he had for his big brood. After a few beers, he'd lean in - nostril hair and all - and give you a shpeel about what a magnificent woman our Nan was. We always replied "ahhh, yup Pop - how the HELL do you think she has put up with you for so long?". Never one to shy away from sharing his opinion you'd always know what he thought. I recall him once telling me it looked like I'd been let loose in a good pasture which was Pop's not too subtle way of telling me I'd put on weight. Thanks Pop. His undeniable knack for a witty, quick cut-down must have been genetic though and in time, all of us kids would learn to give as good as we got!

Now Pop is no longer with us it truly feels like the end of an era. The memories too many, too funny, too poignant. What is so tangible however is that foundation he gave us. That backbone on which we find ourselves building on no matter where all of us kids are or what we find ourselves doing. That nothing trumps the importance of good education and family. His master plan revealed to us in the end which is that he just wanted us to be all happy together and that nothing beats a walk in the bush, a barbecue with the family or dressing up as Father Christmas and grossing your grandchildren out with your freaky teeth (or lack thereof).

So I think it fitting for all of us to imagine him sitting back, glass of ice cold home brew in hand, with that magic wink and smile combo, watching us all usher in this new era. We love you Pop and we promise we'll do you proud.

happy birthday

2011-09-20T08:47:00.003+10:00

happy birthday kee

thanks for making me say no to ugly things in op shops and making sure we ALWAYS have good music to dance to!

love your girls xxx

false advertising

2011-09-20T08:35:00.002+10:00

the weather has been amazing and we managed to ram our pram into the back of the estelle to drink beers on haystacks in the sun as part of the high noon festival. i felt bad 'cause all these people were coo'ing at my tiny human who was happily dancing on my lap for an entire hour and it felt like false advertising. i felt like i needed to have a sign that hung around my neck saying "criminally tired. hungry. pants i just washed and am wearing already covered in soggy cruskit".

BTW - how amazing are cruskits? yes they are tasty but boy, i never imagined they could buy you 5 minutes of peace. I try not to give her too many cause I just imagine them being like polystyrene buoys expanding in her gut. although maybe they could absorb all of those blueberries she has been fanging for lately!

we did have a pretty great weekend though. besty in town. roasted pork belly. ate way too much food. went op shopping. again - its all in the balance...............

a good day

2011-09-16T08:55:00.002+10:00

as a fairly new parent, i'm constantly surprised at my tolerance level for shitness. ie: i remember getting upset about a lot of fairly insignificant things prior to having a baby.

yesterday:

+i accidentally skidded across a friends living room floorboards, knocked over my kid who knocked over her kid who fell and aquired her first facial bruising and went on to scream for the next ten minutes.

+found a vegemite smear on my boob. who from? i couldn't quite tell.

+and get this....*gasp*....wee-d when i sneezed.

and do you know what? i considered yesterday a pretty awesome day.

(incredible quilty thing full of similar reckless abandon via here)

things to make and do

2011-09-15T09:24:00.004+10:00

my mum is coming over for the entire month of october. i was supposed to be going back to work for that time but i got major separation anxiety and felt totally overwhelmed by it so i kicked it to the curb....

so with a spare set of hands i'm going to set myself some lofty goals. mainly packing up the house but also lots of crafting. i haven't been very crafty as of late (although i have just crocheted her a little jumper dress which i'll photograph soon) and i have a fairly lengthy list!

i have decided that for Lottie Pearl's first birthday I want to make her something instead of buying her something. She won't even have a clue anyway. And i'm guessing that my crafting time will be reduced to even less with a busy toddler on my hands next year so here are some of the things i'm thinking about...........

dolly and clothes
dolly in suitcase
fold out pillow bed
birdie wings
sock monkey
dress

do you have any ideas on dealing with your kids first birthday? will you say 'no presents' or 'books only' or maybe even 'handmade' only? have you already bought some presents? do share!

records and ranunculus

2011-09-14T09:18:00.000+10:00

the ubiquitous ikea abacus was the reason behind this week's black eye. it has now turned a lovely green colour and it is garnering two kinds of looks from people. the 'double take have you bashed yr kid' look and the 'i feel your pain' look from parents who have recently gone through the stacking stage. so for now, the abacus has hit the top shelf amongst play of the days. i mean really, do you have a hope in hell of turning out normal if we play you purple rain? we always play you party tunes to get you psyched for bath time. nude and dancing. really. is there anything better?

on the domestic front, i have ignored our vege patch and garden since your arrival. last time i think i was in it was when i was weeding frantically and bawling - you were 14 days overdue and i was massive. the ranunculus never need love and they STILL show their casually beautiful faces, rewarding me for total laziness. that reminds me - we need to organise a busy bee for the garden before we leave.

meanwhile - i am shitfully sick again. we have had a scare with croup and LP is coughing her guts up at night and sounding raspy. nothing worse than youtubing croup coughs at night whilst your husband is out and your baby is crying and barking. s.c.a.r.y. she had a few episodes but then not a peep till morn. so hopefully she is just sick like me and it doesn't escalate. as a consequence we will miss playgroup and are off to the doctors.

dont' think much day time sleep will happen today - once again we'll be exiled to the park to stare at dogs, eat leaves and laugh at the wind blowing (does the breeze blowing in their faces make your kids automatically smile or is it just LP?).

in other words *bleurgh*

gogs and cogs

2011-09-13T19:49:00.002+10:00

an oldie but a goldie.....swimming goggles. they keep you satisfied in the supermarket. in the pram. waiting for mama's necessary 7:30am coffee.

and recently, you have been enjoying wearing them whilst waiting at the traffic lights or getting your nappy changed. even sitting on my lap. your head turns from side to side and i can't help but make whooshing sounds and rock you gently all around, up and down, side to side.

don't think i haven't noticed those cogs whirring and turning, quicker than ever before....

mixed bag

2011-09-12T13:06:00.004+10:00

mixed bag weekend. saturday = good. sunday = bad.

realised we had cooked lunch for friends for the first time since lottie pearl's birth. felt like a 'moment'. lottie pearl marked the occasion by giving herself a giant, puffy, black eye.

the second in as many weeks!

3 piles

2011-09-09T10:20:00.000+10:00

i guess it is rather convenient that we are starting to pack up just as lottie pearl has learnt to crawl and pull up and trash everything in sight.

3 piles have started. Op Shop. Garage Sale. Pack.

I ditched a few old collages I made and many superfluous pretty things have ended up in the garage sale pile. i even unceremoniously threw out almost half of my teenage/uni photo albums. i used to photographically document EVERYTHING and had them printed out in hard copy. these albums weigh a tonne and i've dragged them everywhere. i really don't need so many pictures of me and my friends getting trashed in parks or on camping trips. so i kept a a fair few and dumped the rest in the big bin.

i love being ruthless. or maybe i just like feeling more than okay without all that STUFF.

(but don't get any ideas keegan. i am not. i repeat NOT throwing out any of my books on weaving, string art, paper flower making or macrame - none of which i can actually do...but that is NOT the point!)

double life

2011-09-07T18:51:00.001+10:00

i've been too busy with my double life to even mention it........but i've been getting out and around. espresso martinis have been fueling this fire! i even got myself a haircut and put my face on! (which consists of moisturiser from the health food shop, some mascara and some smelly stuff).

i'd write more but oh, gee, i'm headed out again! hump day drinks and dinner with the mamas.

postscript: kee shaved his hair/beard and LP didn't recognise him...it seems to have bought on our first major case of separation anxiety.....

one photo

2011-09-07T09:58:00.001+10:00

if i had to choose ONE photo to explain my kid? well this would be it.

arms flailing, excitement plus, going berko in anticipation of seeing chooks and leaning over/out sideways over the pram, those starfish hands rippling at a million miles an hour......

what would yours be?

postscript: fucking pram broke this morning. wheel rim snapped off. bought it new 8 months ago! not a happy mama!!!

coughs & chaos

2011-09-06T17:17:00.000+10:00

tough week, thank god the lurgy doesn't belong to US anymore. although k-man is feeling rather sorry for himself.....it has been nice having him a permanent doona monster on the sofa as we go about our day.

finally crawling - less whinging. but more crying due to amazing pulling up stacks. this girl only has one thing in mind and that is being vertical. redecorating was a must. we are now pulling off the 'minimalist' look. but only for half the house. everything waist height is gone and every surface above waist height is total chaos. time for a garage sale.

building site blue mesh fence has GONE and we have now replaced it with total love and adoration for old car yard bunting blowing in the wind. seriously. she is enraptured.

prammy walks have been our saviour. be gone cabin fever, teething, lurgy and crawling frustration!

daddy

2011-09-04T17:05:00.001+10:00

a card we made at playgroup and tacos from the taco truck

thankyou daddy. we love you, even though you are now infected with our lurgy.

don't stop lovin' us

xxx

lottie pearl can officially crawl......safety tips puh-leeease!

marital bliss

2011-09-02T09:45:00.000+10:00

we walk past this each morning and it makes me smile every time.

kee: *long, loud fart that can be heard from the living room*
fifi: is that your mating call?
kee: that is the last post playing of my mating call

ahhhh. marital bliss. it is somehow weird that the thing you have to do in order to get a kid is the thing that is hardest to keep up with once the kid arrives.

stillness/sleeping is overrated

2011-09-01T20:55:00.000+10:00

day time sleeps are scant - blocked nose? teeth? general big girl-ness? i'm not sure but FUCK i'm tired! thankfully one of the mamas bought some beers to the park this afternoon. essential. thankgod you have been 'sleeping in' until after 6am.

your nude crawling is hilarious, as is your need to bang the shit out of everything. oh, and that little bit of excitement wee you do before your bath? well its downright hilarious.

walk walk walk walk walk

2011-09-01T09:17:00.003+10:00

colours make our world go round! can you see that awesome basket i've been eyeing up for LP's toys? too many clam shells unfortunately. LP gave herself a mini black eye stacking it on her toy crate yesterday *mother fail*

(my mum did warn me and of course i didn't listen.....)

on the cusp!

2011-08-31T09:53:00.001+10:00

what a terribly demented day yesterday turned out to be! all we could do was do what we do best - strolling and looking and not spending a minute more than is necessary indoors. we caught a bus for kicks, strolled through preston chinatown, did our usual laps of glory around the nighbourhood. and all the while, trying your hardest not to blow my mind with your 'whinge-crying'. i know its not your fault poor baby but you did do my head in yesterday.

as always though, you redeemed yourself by virtually crawling for the first time. i lured you with my childhood fisher and price record player and it worked a TREAT. you can now make a few tentative 'crawling steps' but mainly go backwards. you can also officially pull yourself onto the sofa.

every morning on our early morning pram walk you demand to touch this piece of blue mesh on a building site fence. i wheel you as close as the wheels will let us and you delight in taking your time to really feel every detail.

morning muse

2011-08-30T09:28:00.000+10:00

went for our usual morning stroll and it was 4 degrees *damn* and it was chilly......but nothin' ticks our boxes as much as watching trams rumble by, trucks clunk by, school kids on their way, bikes zooming past and rosellas having their breakfast blossoms. how amazing are the magnolias?

today we plan to battle the snot with more outings! pram rides and park plays and maybe even another trip to CERES. all in the name of distraction. hard cause I'm sick as well so to keep the energy up is challenging but of course doable. isnt' that the best thing about motherhood? i thought i had no inner strength - as it turns out - i do!

and whilst i'm musing....don't you love it when you share a smile of solidarity with another mother on an early morning pram walk? there are so many of us doing the same thing, almost co-existing without even knowing it. so its nice to connect and say "goodmorning". knowing someone else is out looking at birds with their little human whilst sucking back a morning coffee makes it a-o-k.

tryin' our darndest!

2011-08-29T16:01:00.002+10:00

despite sickness finally hitting our household (for the first time) we are having fun.

pram walks // parks // looking at dogs // laughing at chickens // playing vigorously in the tupperware crate // cafes // CERES //

snuffling and smiling all at the same time! i've noticed that as of late i've been a bit glass half empty so today, despite sickness spoiling sleep-time i have been half glass FULL.

meanwhile - instagram is ADDICTIVE!

mixed bag

2011-08-28T07:43:00.001+10:00

good and bad this weekend.....

good: MEGA tax return // visit from aunty sian // sunshine // husband had friday off // got my first ever phone that wasn't just from the post office pre-paid display cabinet // went for a beautiful little family arvo cuppa at CERES and then a walk along the creek // LP doing loads of dancing

bad: LP developing a nasty habit of waking pre-6am // LP and i battling first ever bout of sickness // finding out my phone has not been sending messages for the last 2 weeks which has left me wondering why no one in my life has been responding to me!

(p.s. so what do i think, as a former photographer, about instagram? this is my first ever phone with a camera. i've always been a fan of low-fi photography so i like it on that front. i also think that photography is for the masses and owned by everyone so again, it appeals to me in that sense. what do i think about these photo treatments? i guess i like them. what i might like more is that i remember using a wood rasper to rasp the inside edges of my negative holder to achieve this actual look when i used to hand print everything in a dark room. those were the days eh? meanwhile i'll enjoy this plastic fantastic instant satisfaction device!)

jasmine spells spring

2011-08-26T12:43:00.000+10:00

dear melbourne,
when we leave you i'll miss the way your seasons remind me of things to come. jasmine spells spring and kee's birthday. we're waving goodbye to the last of the camelias and the magnolias are putting on a brilliant show. i'm even getting to dry some washing out in your very generous sunshine. feeling decidedly reflective and nostalgic about our time with you and will try and relish every moment we have left
xxx

the jasmine creeper outside our laundry & a new bedspread i bought months ago from an oppy, pleading for a dryclean

is it me? or is it you?

2011-08-25T17:40:00.002+10:00

what is it about maternal health nurse check up appointments that leave you feeling like your child is defficient in every way?

we had one today and the major facts i've come away with are: my kid is a midget who doesn't babble.

that is despite the lovely maternal health nurse (a new one) who was so sweet she told me she LOVED my list of questions and gave me a whopping 30 minutes to take it slowly and and get to know us. she was reassuring, calm, quietly spoken, rational, reasonable, practical and compassionate.

this kid is so inquisitive she'd hear a pin drop. she moves and dances like a maniac and won't keep still for quids. she drops big toofy smiles like a rapper drops swear words and besides.......good things come in little packages!!!

loony

2011-08-25T09:50:00.001+10:00

does wind make you feel loony? it totally makes me and my kid CRAZY! if the wind DOES change our faces, we would have a permanently demented expression complete with dishevelled hair! no doubt the ever present food stains on us both would just add to our infirmed look.

meanwhile - i can't get enough of these beautiful tulips unfolding. i probably take the same photos every year of tulips. whilst many people only like them in their 'pursed' form, i love them the more hagged and sloppy they get. please ignore that hideous grey 'feature' stripe from the roof. how dare it make my tulips look all 80's? (although i'm quite partial to yellow and grey as a combo). hideous paint jobs are but a renters reality!

nowadays the kid is capable of staying up for 3 hours at a time. this sees me falling asleep at around 8pm absolutely knackered from the mega-walks, the adventure playground, the dancing, the 'walking about', the noise-making, the bike-riding...........this kids just doesn't stop. it may just be the secret ingredient of my post-preggo weight loss.

finally, rest in piece dori dragon - you were a much loved colleague and friend. i'll always remember your cheeky grin as you skulked around avoiding paperwork smelling of more than a pack of ciggies with the faintest hint of gin. i love the fact you died remaining as wild and un-tamed as you were xxx

rough patch

2011-08-23T09:16:00.002+10:00

rough patches are always so rough because they generally come when you least expect. like after an amazing weekend of sunshine, friends, good food and family togetherness.

roughness seems to hit after your 'expected' rough patch. like when you have something in your immediate future you are dreading. it comes along and you think everything is going to fall apart. you fail to acknowledge that it all stays firmly together and you needn't have worried so much and then....

BAM!

that rough patch hits - just as the dust settles. just as you are squooshing your metaphorical toes into the sand of happiness and possible complacency. what the hell is with that?

what makes it possibly worse is that you feel even more self indulgent for feeling so miffed when you hear of families scouring bushland for their kids' remains, outrageous dictators clinging to power, entire countries starving. even a fellow mama who's kid has croup. even with all that going on i still manage to feel childishly hard done by and like i'd just LOVE a good ole fashioned TANTRUM.

these days can feel especially hard when *gasp - did she really say it* you smile and it doesn't make my heart melt. i feel tired. and old. and really, really BORING. i have to say though - looking at that pack of party whistles you have viciously enjoyed does begin to warm the cockles of my heart............

*rant over*

sat, sun.....i don't want mon!

2011-08-21T16:03:00.003+10:00

blueberries // park // sarah // swings // prawns // champagne // lollies in the park // sunshine // salmon // ladybug helmet for LP // more swings // nearly crawling // tulips // teething // too many dishes.....

up early

2011-08-21T07:21:00.002+10:00

we're up early this morning due to teething. thank god for mr stovetop espresso!!!!

and i have to admit, i've been getting a little excited about celebrating lottie pearl's first birthday! i know we are moving interstate just prior so i'm letting myself think about it all prematurely. i've never had big birthday parties myself but ALWAYS enjoyed hand making invitations.

i don't plan on making a big deal - even our wedding was just a picnic by the river - but i would like to make some invitations and get my sister to make some cupcakes. i have a stack of granny square blankets and would like to have just a 'all welcome, byo picnic' kinda affair.

its not till december so i feel very lame for even mentioning it but hey! here are some images that are helping to inspire me on this early frosty morning whilst LP digs around in her crate of bebe trash.

image one // image two // image three // image four // image five

picture (im)perfect

2011-08-20T08:35:00.001+10:00

its almost disgusting to admit how many photos i've taken of Lottie Pearl. even worse knowing that our second child will probably have only a few photos taken amongst the chaos of raising 2 kids at a time.

my parents have been divorced pretty much my whole life, certainly for my entire memory. they always claim one parent has 'the photo album' and that whoever has it is keeping it secret so they don't have to share it. ridiculously silly i know but i honestly think they find it easier to keep blaming each other rather than admit they have actually just lost it.

of course family photos were different in the 80's. slide and negative film was expensive and there was still the magic of sending a roll away and having that ONE magic photo where everything worked and it was beautiful. otherwise all the other photos were just 'records' complete with blurriness, non-smiles, closed eyes.

now we take a million photographs of the same thing until we get the image we like. it means there is a much greater 'filter' on our life. i guess the same could be said for blogging. it is a contrived selection of our 'life'. i find this all incredibly interesting and wrote part of my thesis on the concept of authenticity within photography. now with a child i find myself striving for that perfect image but then ultimately deciding the best photo is merely just a record of an incredible moment. composition, focus and intangible beauty are all just a bonus.

i think i am becoming a mother in every sense - where sentimentality blinds aesthetics!

(I finally just edited the mass collection of photos of Lottie Pearl's entire life and printed hard copies of them all! total satisfaction!)

flying tips

2011-08-17T09:05:00.001+10:00

lottie pearl has just flown her 8th flight. by the time she's 1 year old she'll have flown 11 times..............so i guess i do have a few tips but most of them are dependent upon the individual baby. I have also flown half of those on my own without K so my biggest tip of all would be to try and travel with your partner.

1) Don't be afraid to use TIT! I have never been one to over-boob my kid. but on the plane sometimes you just need to provide a little comfort. and for me, its the only way my little human stays still!

2) Ask for help - thats what stewards are for! If you need to go to the toilet, don't be a martyr - just ask a flighty to hold yr kid for you. There are always at least a few on board that are outrageously clucky and will only be too happy to help you out. Otherwise, just look for the resident grandma - you know, the one who has been endlessly staring and smiling and commenting on your baby since boarding.

3) Have everything within reach - lunchbag, toys, a snack for you, spare nappies. Just make sure your usual nappy back is stocked to the hilt! Also, use stuff on the plane to amuse your kid. Especially if like mine, she's bored of anything that remotely resembles a toy. Empty bottles, laminated safety pamphlets, seatbelts, plastic cups, spoons, headphones with the foam covers removed. You name it, she loves it!

4) Don't fly at night. Seriously. We've made the mistake ONCE and it wasn't pretty. I know some people recommend flying when your kid is meant to be snoozing but that just doesn't apply to ours. We try and fly in the morning that way we can give her a nap when we get to our destination.

5) Have your destination set up and ready to go. I ask whoever is having us to have portacot, heater, blinds blocked out and even some food ready so that as soon as we arrive we have everything set out and can just get straight back into our routine. Also, plan for a relaxing day the next day so you can get back into your routine and give bub a break from the chaos the day before.

6) Time difference? oh time difference absolutely blows. I just spent 10 days in perth living on melbourne time. not pretty at all but hey, after 3 days of trying to change her little body clock and failing it felt much easier to just go with her. even though I was up between 4 and 5am it also meant she was in bed by 5pm and i could hang out with my family which was super nice. I guess I'm a fan of the path of least resistance.

7) Lastly - just try and remain calm and confident. As always - your baby feels your vibes and will certainly stress out if you do. Babies cry (especially on descent as that is when they get the most ear trouble so just give them booby or water bottle then to suck on to help them equalize) and the fact is that probably 80% of the people onboard have kids, want kids or know kids. Just try and be compassionate to your kid - whatever you find boring, uncomfortable and tiresome - chances are, they will too.

What are your tips?

and off we go again!

2011-08-15T15:44:00.000+10:00

what a whirlwind..........

after 10 days in darwin, then 5 nights home with a visit from my dad, we booked and left for Perth to visit my gravely ill Poppy so we could say goodbye.

despite being there for such a sad reason, especially after having to return home 5 months earlier as my uncle died suddenly, we had some amazing family time. all the things i am looking forward to about our return back to perth in december. just hanging out and doing all the good stuff. strolling. playing with the hose. long baths. riding in laundry baskets. op shopping. i even managed to have my first hangover since lottie was conceived! (yuk, its overrated people!).

and now we're home again. as always, lottie travelled amazingly well and just picked us all up when we were feeling down. pretty sure he won't last till our return in december but we love you poppy. you remain a stubborn old bastard right up til the end.

and mum? all i can say is thanks :)

2011-08-02T09:29:00.000+10:00

we heart the tropics! (*ahem* only in the dry season may i point out). the in-laws live in what can only be described as an open air tree house. we spent our days swimming in the pool, croc-free lagoons, bird watching, sunset strolling, market go-ing, eating, cooking, nudey playing and eating all manner of tropical fruit goodness! we have decided that Lottie Pearl's skin name is Little Papaya - after all the papaya she consumed!

loads of time with uncles, aunties, grandparents, great grandparents and cousins! it has totally reinforced our decision to move to perth.........we barely picked up a toy whilst we were in darwin - because the outdoors were all we needed. simple things like sand, lawn, water in washing baskets, warm breezes.

we even visited the 'fun bus' a mobile playgroup bus which goes to different parks and set ups activities for kids of all ages! lottie absolutely loved it all!

darwin - we can't wait to visit again soon!

{break in transmission}

2011-07-22T07:44:00.000+10:00

see you all soon! (yum, we ate all the rest of the broc, pea and fetta tart we made - of course smothered with our family recipe sri lankan chutney)

tropical holiday

2011-07-21T20:25:00.000+10:00

tomorrow, we're heading off on a plane to spend some time with the in-laws in darwin! tropical heat here we come!

this will be lottie's 5th time on a plane but she is such a pepped up bebe now i'm actually a teensy bit apprehensive. no more sleeping in mama's arms for starters....

so whats a mama to do? put together an action pack of never seen before toys, as well as some old time favourites all together in a homemade toy bag! i'm playing on lottie's absolute weakness for shiny, loud and colourful things and have sewn a bunch of stuff into gladbags. that way she gets to touch and feel without CHOKING! i've also been saving milk bottle lids and the likes and have threaded them, between cut straws onto some wool to make a super interesting and very chewable piece of bebe trash! she totally loves this kinda stuff!

and if all else fails - bring out the car keys!

(i implore you to go ahead and make such toys for your bebe but if they have teeth like mine, of course they'll need constant supervision when playing with them! but y'all mamas out there know that!)

new day

2011-07-21T10:32:00.001+10:00

i'm so glad its a new day. its so hard when you feel super angry, frustrated and down in the dumps and you have no time or right to express it. i feel like i can't have those feelings anywhere near Lottie Pearl. Its unfair and just unhelpful. of course when she is older it will be important for her to understand that everyone has different feelings but right now, she just needs me to be full of smiles, love and enthusiasm.

as opposed to feeling like i could stab her miffy doll.

to be fair - yesterday got SO bad it became laughable. your sweet messages and even a parcel arriving from some friends in perth choc full-o-pressies of course made things better! i even went down to our local bookshop perimeter to buy myself some japanese books and the hello sandwich wrapping guide and that definitely put a smile on my dial.

so today i look forward to LP sleeping for longer, my mamas group coming over for lunch and packing our bags for a mini tropical holiday!!!

grey clouds

2011-07-20T09:37:00.002+10:00

must be general winter discontent being blown around.....

today i'm going to be stomping around immaturely, leaving unwanted bills in the letterbox to get rained on and eaten by snails, being lazy, not playing nice and DEFINITELY not calmly talking through disagreements.

i'm so grumpy i can't even find a picture to suit!

chewing straws is good for teef pain!

2011-07-19T10:21:00.000+10:00

weekend!

2011-07-18T09:14:00.003+10:00

opshopping, sewing bibkerchiefs and zippy purses, eating and cooking too much, lunching, dinners, all nighters (for K that is), great grandparents and listening to BON IVER's new record over and over and over!

what i didn't capture on film was my sunday arvo tantrum at K about NOTHING. turns out i just needed a nap, a big cuddle and a glass of wine!

friday, as i find it!

2011-07-15T22:22:00.000+10:00

today is friday and this is how some of the drawers around my house look! my faves are the last ones....small drawers i found in a junk shop. made with wood and sardine tins!

i think its nice to show a few more photographs of how things 'are' without too much primping and preening!

these modern times

2011-07-15T08:47:00.002+10:00

how lucky, as stay at home mamas, are we to be able to connect with others without even leaving our own four walls? my mum speaks a lot about isolation when she was in a brand new suburb out in the sticks with 2 small children. it really affected her experience.

thanks hatchling for thinking of me and reminding me that there are so many lovely connections to be had out there in this world AND that i shouldn't be so scared of moving "home"

meanwhile - whilst i wait for overlocker lessons to start - my old bernina is getting a work out! bibs, bibkerchiefs and bloomers are all being furiously sewn up. i'm really enjoying cutting patterns, taking my time and doing things neatly. even if i have to do it in many stages, across several days!

winter comforts

2011-07-14T13:51:00.001+10:00

we got fancy and purchased a beautiful choc brown leather sofa recently. perfect for cuddling, crafting and easy to wipe baby drool off of!

next on my reading list are these two books. recommended by the lovely book-nerd girl who said they are somewhat like my fave book 'a confederacy of dunces'. wonder how long it will take me to plough through these babies!

(if you look closely you can see the beautiful bird that Catherine from Little Glowing Lights made! Its hanging on our kitchenette drawer handles and is made from liberty fabric *oooooo*)

rainy days

2011-07-13T20:34:00.000+10:00

something really special about watching lottie pearl listen to the wind and rain outside. makes you really take notice. the whoosh of the trees. squawking birds. the screech of corrugated iron. the flapping of our big chinese lanterns hanging outside. the sudden downpour of fat raindrops.

she looks and listens. then she looks up at me just to check i'm still by her side.

of course i am, piccolo!

baby anderson's shower

2011-07-13T09:48:00.000+10:00

outrageously yummy high tea and some of the patches everyone made for baby anderson's quilt

like katrina & the waves said........

2011-07-12T10:19:00.000+10:00

Lottie Pearl slept from 730pm - 7am. No dream feed either. This song pretty much sums it up (not to mention transports me back to when I used to listen to this on my cassette walkman when i was about 6)

HOUSEWORK: 0 Vs FUN: 1

2011-07-11T09:58:00.001+10:00

on the weekend, HOUSEWORK and FUN had a battle. FUN clearly won.......and the whole house is feeling back on their A game.

honey joy making, baby shower, cooking, sleeping, having alone time, crafting, football watching, and even finishing my book *gasp* which i've been reading since march. i used to average about 20 books a year.....not anymore!

picnic

2011-07-10T08:52:00.003+10:00

i love 'weather envy' that happens across the hemisphere via blogland. winter here, summer there. quite fitting as we contemplate our move from wintery melbourne back to ever sunny perth!

one thing i'm really looking forward to is picnics for more months of the year! i'm imagining picnics at the beach, bush, river etc to be a pretty good toddler activity for my already bursting-at-the-seams-energy-wise bebe. its the stuff of my own childhood.

wouldn't these 'sangrias to go' be the perfect thing for mama and papa on said picnics? ooooh yes please!

p.s. happy birthday to my dear brother. i love looking at you and knowing no one else on this planet looks and sounds more like me than you. i love our quiet and ever-increasingly open solidarity. i love how intelligent, compassionate, hilarious and bombastic you are. i love it that you aren't willing to forego your principles even if it means causing waves. i love your sense of individuality and your incredible knack of making people think twice about all manner of things xox

baby anderson

2011-07-09T16:12:00.001+10:00

baby anderson is due in september and we're having his baby shower tomorrow a couple of streets over! it will be so awesome to see my old, good friend Rus as a doting, first time father.

i made a pram blanket from beautiful bendigo wool which is australia's only grown, dyed, spun and sold wool (most yarn companies send australian wool to be processed in china). i hope baby anderson has many years of pram strolling, snuggling, spewing and picnicing with the blanky. it really was made with love.

we also had to make a patchwork square to be sewn up on the day into a quilt for baby anderson. i used much loved scraps of mine - bits and bobs i've hoarded for years and some picked up in tokyo. i'm excited to see how it turns out and what everyone else will create!

Aint it always so.....

2011-07-08T09:43:00.004+10:00

It always seem - just as you are riding that wave of happiness, feeling content and not thinking of anything but the moment - something (or nothing in particular) comes along and makes you feel flat, less than amazing and somewhat down in the dumps!

yesterday was one such day. nothing to do with Lottie Pearl. all just to do with me. granted, extra hair pulling, being vomited on and a day of teething anguish didn't do much in the way of improving my flatness! I then made myself feel guilty for temporarily being less than the mama LP needs me to be.

Lottie Pearl is now nearly 7 months old and whilst our little family continues to settle in and feel just fab I find myself at odds with the outside world. Again, this conundrum of who am i, where do i fit in now etc. My mum always tells me "don't overthink it" so I console myself with the notion that Its Okay to feel like I don't have any petrol left in the tank. Its Okay to hand LP over to K and say "please take her" whilst i spend a little alone time in bed.

Leaving the house on a chilly winter night was not really what I had in mind, but we had a long planned dinner with my Mothers group, sans babes, and boy did it fill my tank right up! So good to laugh, be unattached, make irreverent jokes about any manner of things and just relish in the moment of feeling rejuvinated by each others company.

When we move, I'll miss these ladies more than words can say.

and today? I wake up feeling excited to pick Lottie Pearl up out of her cot. Excited about a day of hair pulling, traversing our neighbourhood despite the weather and most of all just relishing in the company of ourselves. cause it just won't. last. forever.

hello?

2011-07-06T09:39:00.004+10:00

being a new mama you kinda struggle with the old self and the new self. the two selves collide, and sometimes awkwardly, not to mention the self that is forged from a combination of the two.

renee over at renosslah has inspired this post - what makes me feel 'me' despite now finding myself in this whole new world of stay at home mama-ness. in some ways i feel more myself than ever. i've never worn a full face of make up and have gone through stages of taking my time to get ready but now what informs my ensembles are a)weather b)what is clean c)boob access. i'll always care about aesthetics as such! its just another fun game to be able to put texture and colour together!

in recent years i've put away more of the vintage (although had a huge revival when i was pregnant as all i could fit were giant nanna frocks and i refused to wear maternity wear) and i guess gone for what can only be described as MISH MASH! i'm an op-shopper, a maker and unashamedly i find some of my best bits and bobs at target and kmart! i also love a good 'uniform' wardrobe in which about ten items circulate and mix and match and i do this for a good 6 months to a year until slowly new essentials find their way in.

i love anything 'sack-ish' over skinny jeans or leggings. the bigger and floppier the better! i call it 'bag lady chic' and feel there is nothing better than rocking a muumuu!

i also LOVE a good 'pattern spew'. sometimes K laughs at me as I walk out the door with what seems a haphazard approach to putting patterns together. in my world there are no no-no's only YES YES YES to PATTERN! i love pattern on pattern in my house and on me! even if the pattern spew is a bit crazy for me i still love the feeling of being fearless about putting whatever feels good to me on. i think i've been that way since i was a kid.

so cue what makes me me (at the moment!)
//ACCESSORIES
+handmade necklaces
+my riki watanabe watch from our trip to tokyo
+my wedding rings
+opshopped scarves
//GARMENTS
+a mix of patterns, textures and colours! yellows, oranges and fuschia pinks mixed with browns, greys and blacks. linen, wool, opshopped jackets - all put together unapologetically and usually layered like a bag lady!
//SHOES
+clogs, moccasins (bought in nyc), tie on plastics and always with coloured/printed/bold leggings, tights and socks!

so thats me? follow renee's lead and show us who you are!

marimekko makes my coffee taste better!

2011-07-05T07:47:00.001+10:00

there has been an ongoing argument about cups in our house. i've been naughtily using K's moomin cup he bought in tokyo....

so i bought myself this marimekko cup from luft and i have to say - coffee? you taste better flavoured with a bit of marimekko! and of course K has been cheekily threatening to steal it for his hot chocs! NO WAY PAL!

big news

2011-07-04T08:25:00.003+10:00

photos from the last time we lived in perth// lunch, my local beach and collected shells

its official! we have decided to move to our hometown of perth. i have handed in my resignation, kee will transfer his apprenticeship and we will depart for the sunny west coast at the end of november/early december.

it came after much deliberation. since having lottie pearl in our lives our priorities have completely changed. whilst we love this big city and everything it has to offer us, we have no family support or any means of enjoying it! of course we have the most amazing inner-city life filled with everything you could ever want, good coffee, gorgeous cafes and lovely parks but there was this swelling inside of us that just seemed to keep rising up..........at the end of the day, we want to share our childhood memories of the beach and bush with our darling girl.

we spent a couple of weeks drawing up pros and cons tables, recruiting fair and unbiased opinions of well respected associates but at the end of the day the decision was up to us. we have had the most incredible time here. we will have been here for nearly 4 years. we moved here as career-less newlyweds and now can depart with a beautiful daughter, incredible work and life experiences and life-long friends who have been made and sorely missed.

it will certainly be an emotional move. how will it feel to be back in our hometown. you grow up having a perpetual feeling of needing to escape. and now we find ourselves returning no longer looking outside to fill some internal space with new sights and delights. instead our focus has shifted to our daughter. whilst of course we will continue to broaden her horizons and give her every bit of the world we can it just seems right to think of having tea at the beach, riding our bikes along the river, driving down to our favourite family camping spots....

there is danger of looking at 'home' through rose coloured glasses and believe you me we are not doing that. it will be HOT beyond belief (goodbye amazing coat collection) and dry too (goodbye easy gardening!) and we will not have cafes within strolling distance nor be able to buy organic meat, cheap f&v, food goods of the world and all within a ten minute walking radius of our house. we will be moving back to a place that relies on cars more, as opposed to feet, bike and public transport here.

every pro has a con and every con has a pro. i find myself thinking things like "oh, i'll miss wearing socks with clogs" followed by "awesome! won't have to wear socks with clogs!"

this new phase in our lives is scary and exciting all at once............and moving interstate with a 1 year old in tow will certainly be interesting!

deserted island decisions

2011-06-30T09:15:00.004+10:00

so here are my choices if i were to be stuck on an island......

//food\\
starter: antipasto - cured meats, cheeses and pickled veg are just my go to!
main: fish curry - my first ever curry i tried was a fish curry and i still remember it in fine detail....
dessert: vanilla slice - i love the whole spectrum of 'snot blocks' from the school canteen ones with pink icing to the avante-garde with creamy white italian custard
drink: champagne no question :) dry and as cold as you can serve it!

//music\\
of course this one is a hard one.....even with being allowed one artists entire discography! my two toss-ups couldn't be further from one another. Sade or Bjork? Its a tough one. Wow. I'm stuck. But I have to choose! Shit! Okay....SADE! There. *phewf* that was hard......

//object\\
this is a weird inclusion on my behalf. of course your immediate family is allowed on this island.....and i'm not even going to think of something smart like 'fridge' - i was thinking along the lines of the thing i find most beauty in and if it has a function or sentimentality then its an added bonus! but maybe i'd just like to say 'pen and paper' because i would be absolutely lost in this life if i could not write something down. but maybe lists would be redundant on this island?

//hobby\\
i'd love to say weaving although i've never done it before! and i'm wondering whether i'd have to choose between knitting or crochet or whether they count as the same thing? i'm rather accomplished at crochet but have a long way to go with knitting so knitting it is. it uses much more brainpower for me and i'd have all the time in the world..........right?

Catherine from Little Glowing Lights has joined in - head on over to check out her island life!

stuck on an island food

2011-06-28T11:48:00.004+10:00

brown rice, cucumber, ricotta, chilli tuna, avocado and a sprinkling of tamari....

this would surely be one of my meals should i ever find myself deserted on an island with only a few choices FOREVER

makes me think about other things i'd bring with me if only one choice. music? clothes? object?

so tell me - what would you take if you could only take one of the following........

food: starter, main, dessert and drink
music: one artist's entire discography
object: your favourite belonging i guess
hobby: one kind of activity that could keep you satisfied forever

next post i'll tell you mine - join me, make a post and let me know!

off the needles

2011-06-27T09:19:00.002+10:00

two 'man' beanies off the knitting needles...one for matt and one for pop john!

i use the 'purl soho winter beanies for everyone' pattern which is SO simple yet perfect and open to many variations! i highly recommend it. these are fairly plain versions but I've enjoyed making versions with simple stripes and bright block colours. they are great for my tired brain as they are easy yet satisfying!

next up! crochet blanky for baby anderson due in september....i'm looking forward to it!

roadtrippin'

2011-06-26T15:52:00.002+10:00

we've been on a fair few trips interstate and also a trip to the grampians since Lottie was born however we've always been with family or friends! K had an rdo so we decided to head away for one night just the three of us. its the first time we've been away and had long car rides since we gave the dummy away and since Lottie has learnt to sleep - so we were a little scared - didn't want to upset the apple cart!

she was so amazing! she slept in the car, was dragged around from country op shop to country op shop, endured sleeping in a strange place/cot and absolutely LOVED the spa bath! it was so lovely to have a bath all the three of us. and it suddenly dawned on me - i love my little family more than anything in the whole entire world and there really are few things better than hanging out together.

i even managed a bit of knitting and now we're home, Lottie has popped her third toof! top left. *sigh* they just grow so quickly don't they?

hope everyones weekend was as equally delightful as ours.....

tucker time

2011-06-23T15:25:00.007+10:00

seems like the ability to take a photo of the mini lady in focus is all but impossible as she's always on the go! tucker time is no exception.

thanks to one yellow jumpsuit for inspiring me to share a little gif love! you can too - right here!

i feel like.........

2011-06-20T08:19:00.000+10:00

i feel like wearing something like this...........

found here and here!
(i already have the clogs! been thinking of another pair....a blue low pair. which along with my high black patent pair would make it 3 pairs! they are just so versatile and so, so, so strong. i hate shoes these days - you pay $300 for them and they break in a season)

scarf, scoff, sleep, surprise!

2011-06-19T07:34:00.002+10:00

the most beautiful hand dyed scarves by UNIFORM NATURAL - which one would you choose? I'm loving the mustard (of course) the fuschia (of course) but long to be as restrained as a one of the muted greys or even that very light pinky one.

another brilliant weekend here. visit from best friend. meeting mums at the bar for wine. eating the best hand made noodles on our side of town.....

lottie pearl has also "slept through" for the last 5 nights........i still give her a dream feed and she's still getting the hang of waking up at a civilised time but we are getting there!

and finally? some big change on our horizons. stay tuned!

love to everyone on this sunday xxx

vitamin c(raft)

2011-06-14T15:55:00.000+10:00

some homemade baby toys we've made up to keep us from climbing the walls on those days when the weather doesn't permit any strolling!

.....happy to drink fresh squeezed orange juice in order to get the orange mesh bag to stuff with cellophane!

time flies......

2011-06-13T07:48:00.002+10:00

today lottie pearl is 6 months old. wow. words can't describe these last 6 months. is it possible to feel more like yourself at the same time as feeling completely reborn? maybe something like seeing an old lover - so familiar yet you have no idea who they are now.

ive finished off her 'birth' box - everything from pregnancy photos, hospital bands, birth cards and silly mementos like scribblings of feed times stained with coffee - and i have to say it feels amazing and definitely a relief to box up and say goodbye to the last 6 months. our lives have been changed irrevocably. never have i before had a job that goes 24/7, a job that requires so many decisions, a job that punches the wind out of my lungs as i gasp in wonder at the love i have for this tiny human.

i don't think this fumbling feeling will ever fade but these mama pants are fitting better, closer, every day. as i put the birth box away it feels as though we are emerging. i childishly feel as though i've been forgotten by a good few people. i feel like shouting "we've survived! i'm still here! come and play!" but i'm not too sure if anyone would hear. hard not to feel hurt but instead, trying to gather all this new found steam inside me. A good portion going towards the next 6 months, a reduced but sizeable hunk for kee and lastly, setting aside a little for myself - this new albeit familar self - with even more outrageous goals and dreams than ever before.

saturday splits

2011-06-12T08:15:00.001+10:00

saturday splits : i get the first half of the day off, k gets the second half of the day off!

i had breakfast at el joyero, went for a joyride whilst listening to the sugarcubes and the immaculate collection by madonna and having a stingingly strong coffee in a little greek cafe complete with 80's floral table arrangements of carnations {love} and of course picking up the overlocker.

if i were still a photographer (in the occupational sense) i would have loved to have done a shoot there. all beige and monochromatic and lovely in the ugliest of ways. definitely heading back there as it is close to one of my fave clothes stores toolz

saturday morning

2011-06-11T07:42:00.004+10:00

kee has lottie duty this morning and unfortunately her noises awaken my infernal (& internal) mama instincts and i can't sleep in! BUT i can lay in bed and read and drink my morning stovetop coffee and FEEL as though i were relaxing. but tragically, all i can think about is her. how much did she eat for breakfast? is that whimpering i hear because she isn't comfortable? whats happening out there!!!!

mama bear instinct....sometimes i love you. you make decisions, and good ones, without even consulting my brain. but sometimes, just sometimes i wish you'd switch the hell off so i could RELAX!

saturday is our switch up day so i'm quite excited. i get the first half of the day off and then we swap. I just zoom past to boob her when she needs. i think i'm going to perve at paper at Zetta Florence and also pick up my overlocker!

yep. you got me.

2011-06-10T08:55:00.004+10:00

okay - our life is FAR from perfect. sometimes it really annoys me how everyone 'assumes' K and I have the perfect little relationship. we've had just as many hard times, if not more and being married is NO picnic, let me assure you.

HOWEVER - there are moments like yesterday when he comes home from work (as an electrician's apprentice) all grubby and tired and he produces a gift such as this.....

a turquoise platignum rollerball pen - with the disclaimer "I know you wanted a ballpoint instead of a rollerball and you wanted black ink rather than blue....but the colour was just perfect!"

thankyou for always listening to my continual dribbling about all manner of things. even if sometimes you don't answer, i know its all filtering through :)

i love you xxx

teeny tiny textile

2011-06-10T08:26:00.005+10:00

one day i'll be as awesome as sheila hicks but right now there is a large cavernous space between my weaving abilities and hers.....

so this is "one step closer to sheila" - an homage to all those friendship bracelets i made as a child and sold from a wrapped cardboard box for 5 cents as a lucky dip with the girl over the road, Jadee Dodd. we used to sit in the sun, our knees all scabby from rollerskating stacks, holding the embroidery thread between our toes as we plaited and knotted away.

a teeny tiny piece of knotmaking.

BUT the real fun starts when I do my full day workshop intro to machine knitting at popcraft. this will be a long life goal achieved and definitely one step closer to sheila!

colour me happy

2011-06-09T11:47:00.003+10:00

its thursday - almost time for the LONG weekend....even though mum has gone, we've had a fab couple of days. i'm really enjoying all the giggling sessions Lottie Pearl and I seem to get up to these days. kinda like we have a continual private joke about nothing but which makes us lose it every time! i'm never shy about playing games with her on a bus or in public even though i must sound mad!

i'm hoping to finish off the handmade albums i've been working on of Lottie's birth and first few days home and i'm also hoping to go and put an overlocker on layby!!! *eeep* it feels a little crazy buying something so huge when i have such little crafting time but from all accounts these things save you STACKS of time......especially when sewing for the mini lady.

and on a more existential note - do you find it a positive or a negative to always dream or wish you were doing something different, being somewhere else? does it mean you are never happy with right now or do you think it is part of life to dream about your future?

apologies - can't remember where on ETSY i found these tin cups......

weekend

2011-06-08T12:00:00.003+10:00

my mum visited this weekend all the way from perth. it meant k & i could sneak off for a few of life's luxuries like dinners, climbing, crafting and pubbing!

mum (or Gran) left last night and we miss her so much already. watching her play with Lottie Pearl i saw so much of myself. my mum never had a career as such but i think she did such an amazing job with us 3 kids. i'm proud to see myself as a mama in her. at times, i wish it were like the olden days and she lived just down the street. not to be in this modern world.....

on another note....i've been thinking about how many real friends i have. i heard an article on ABC radio about how many friends a person has. how many do you think you have? i've always been quality over quantity but particularly now with a baby i think my circle of friends has become even smaller. and i know i appreciate so much the friendship i have gained through this here blog.

above are some horses from our collection of horse paintings. one day we'll have that house, with a big fireplace and a wall full of horses......

update: owl binky is officially ACCEPTED!

fuel for my engine

2011-06-04T15:36:00.003+10:00

sometimes its hard, with everything going on in my head and in the day to remember to eat. which is silly cause i'll have more energy if i put more fuel into my engine!

here are some lunches from this week. tuna and ricotta salad with a few crisps and a pumpkin and boiled egg vindaloo.

add a cup of tea and a few moments of silence whilst bebe is sleeping and you have one temporarily happy and satiated mama!

update: don't think my owl binky is going to fool Lottie.....she seems determined to reach for the ugly pink thing! maybe i need to add some satin to the owl to try and compete!

binky + whats in yr bag?

2011-06-02T11:38:00.004+10:00

turquoise seems to be a coincedental theme as of late......

this is whats in my bag (encouraged via Dos Family)

and since we've given away the dummy, Lottie Pearl has taken to a disgusting pale pink satin blanky thing with a bear head. It was given to her......I don't know why I find it so gross (maybe the already stinky sucked on ears) but in case she gets extra attached to her 'Binky' I thought it smart if I could make them myself. So tonight we'll test if she likes this! It has spent a few nights under my pillow to get my smell on it......

very selfish but it makes a mama feel better if it is homemade. waaaay better than super-synthetic-light-a-match-to-it-and-it-will-explode version. plus, it was nice to use the sewing machine for the first time in a long time!

5 minute crafting

2011-06-01T16:05:00.002+10:00

i miss craft. i miss the luxury of spending a day with all my shit sprawled over our table and just pecking at bits and pieces as inspiration hits me.

so this hama bead necklace was just a moment of loveliness where my old friend Craft and I sat down to catch up. We had nothing original to say. We just reminded each other that even though we don't get to see each other that often anymore we still think of each other, often.

5 minute crafting is where its at these days!

postal pleasures

2011-06-01T08:52:00.005+10:00

a package of love from way out west! thankyou ninny!

happy socks, beautiful felting wool (colours of course are perfect!), organic seeds and a paper duck all wrapped up and posted in hand-printed paper.

5 minute crafting - here i come! (more on that later.....)

new here

2011-05-31T09:07:00.004+10:00

sweet little pocket on my new t-shirt and a big square floppy knit jumper. all from our family travels up the end of sydney road.

i know its wrong to love cheap imported clothing so much. but most of my clothing is op-shopped.

does op-shopping for clothes help balance it out at all?

do you have a moral quandry at the minute?

weekend

2011-05-30T08:17:00.006+10:00

of course weekends are the best. it means i do this whole baby thing with kee by my side for a whole 2 days in a row!

//drinking super strong coffee with old italian men on sydney road//cruising smith street//listening to gil scott heron records//watching footy and movies//walking//saying goodbye to a friend//giggling at our super banal conversations//

and more importantly.....with this new lease on life (aka SLEEPING and SLEEPING BABY) we are starting to uncover ourselves, become a lil more comfy with this new family life and even though its winter right now......it almost feels like spring!

(saw these amazing MANIMAL moccassins in OBUS)

gil scott heron

2011-05-29T09:04:00.003+10:00

"Blow wind blow, between the pages of my life" (Song of Wind, Bridges, 1977)

rest in peace gil scott heron

i never knew you existed until i met my (now) husband. we fell in love over and to your music. i know there will be much more living room dancing, road tripping and life living to your beautiful music. my daughter will grow up knowing who you are.

rewind

2011-05-28T08:15:00.003+10:00

some beautiful chyrsanthemums from the royal tasmanian botanical gardens back in may nestled amongst one of my faves maiden hair fern

whilst there my father in law heard a mini person ask his mum what 'botanical' meant. she replied "oh you know, when things are flowery and pretty".

i guess thats kinda true!

livin' local

2011-05-27T09:41:00.004+10:00

we live in thornbury and we are blessed with sooooo many great local cafes, shops and characters. its such a lovely place to be a stay at home mama in. such a feeling of community and everyone is really friendly. no one is too cool for school and i like it that way. a beautiful blend of old and young people and a lovely blend of cultures. oh and how could i forget the great op shops!

we were discussing in perimeter last night how it will be a shame when the people who have made this area such a great place to live will be priced out of the rental market......we've been here for 2 and a half years now and just can't imagine living anywhere else. people used to laugh when we told them we lived "all the way up in thornbury" and it was even dubbed as North Northcote. Bah!

two places that are just really ticking my boxes at the moment are:

el joyero - such lovely people, a gorgeous interior and divine coffee
perimeter books - beautiful art/indie publications, along with japanese books and a lovely shop owner

it feels nice to have these places as part of our daily landscape - so check them out if you happen to be in our 'hood! (perimeter has been blogged about fairly extensively about the place....i love it - my mum who lives in a small town in western australia told me about it over the phone this morning!)

uno momento

2011-05-25T11:29:00.003+10:00

realised that maybe i should pay a little more attention to this blog.....after all - it sometimes is my only connection to the outside world!

i've never really wrote toooooo much stuff on here, always in favour of pictures and the like but maybe it might help. things just seem very much 'one step forward, two steps back' but we gotta make the best out of the small victories and as someone wise told me "catch the moments of happiness"

i guess i'd really love to catch some zzzz's

(meanwhile, i love these bags from baggu! and thankyou blogland for keeping me sane during all the bouts of sleeplessness and in our time away from the real world out there! don't know how my mum did it without the internet :)

sleep or lack thereof

2011-05-21T08:56:00.005+10:00

long time between drinks on this here blog.....

battling booby problems and sleep problems but somehow muddling our way through!

last night we had a home visit from someone to help us sort out some of Lottie Pearl's sleeping difficulties and my was it tough. the night started off well - her first night sleeping with no dummy or wrap! but after around 3am it just disintegrated. so hard not to feel disheartened. that silly thought "are we the ones who have that baby who can't be tamed?"

lottie pearl has an amazingly fierce and expressive heart. she's so fun to be around. she really is. i'm so happy we can have such beautiful awake time. we just need to work on the sleep time! we'll get there baby girl!

so after a horror night and after a big LOOOOOOONG play (even though she was ready to go back to sleep 30 mins after she woke) she fell into bed, no dummy, no wrap, just my big beautiful 5 month old. no protest. nothing. 1 1/2 hours later? she's still sleeping :) first time ever she has slept for that long. EVER!

thankyou lottie pearl. you are my wonder girl xxx

(don't this family look amazing? homemade clothes for everyone by shisomama......this pattern looks like a goody and an easy too! c'mon craft - i want you back in my life!)

we're baaaaaaack

2011-05-03T15:30:00.005+10:00

okay - so after a really stressful couple of weeks, we had a really beautiful 10 days. first in the grampians and then in tasmania. just what we needed. we decided just to break all the rules in terms of what to do with your baby and we just went with it. sure there were still loads of tears, only the super mini-est catnaps and what has turned into the usual nighttime scream attacks....

but HEY! flying by the seat of our pants just made us feel normal and spontaneous again.....

we enjoyed bushwalks, baths in random sinks, way too much food, art (oh MONA how you are awesome) and got to do some lovely things like have long showers and day time naps whilst the grandparents had bebe.

lottie pearl may not be so good at the whole settled thing but she is super stirling to travel with!!!

now, back at home i feel refreshed, more confident and even though this whole motherhood thing is relentless i'm feeling like things could be on the up! well at the very least, our calendar is jammed with fun things in the immediate and not too distant future!

pear-shaped

2011-04-19T08:42:00.003+10:00

life has been rather pear-shaped lately.
no time to take photos.
no time to blog.
no time!
sometimes i wish we were close to family.
sometimes i wish i knew just what our little baby Lottie wants.
sometimes i just wish i could sleep for a million years.

what did i used to do before she?
(i must have wasted so much time.....)

thank goodness there will be 9 days in a row of mama, papa & baby time ahead.

happy birthday sissy

2011-04-11T09:16:00.005+10:00

happy birthday to my darling sissy....love all of our memories like rollerskating to phil collins, singing in the rain, dressing up, colouring in and just generally hanging out like a right royal pair of Bib and Bobs.

so proud of everything you have achieved and the person you have become. you are amazing, caring, compassionate, flippin' hilarious and so, so, so beautiful.

love k, f & lp xoxox

weekend lunching

2011-04-11T08:51:00.007+10:00

weekend spent lunching and enjoying fine company and food! above is a sour cherry cake we made for a friends birthday. my omama's easy recipe again - just so versatile and easy!

omama cake
weigh 4 x eggs without breaking them....
then add same weight of: sugar, self raising flour, butter
some vanilla or lemon zest if you wish and depending on the fruit you use
combine and add a splash or two of milk to make a thick batter
pour into greased and lined springform cake tin and add fruit of choice
(think cherries, apple, pear, peach, blueberries.....anything really!)
sprinkle with raw sugar and bake in medium pre-heated oven until done!
finish with icing sugar if you like and find a bunch of friends to share with, along with a cup of tea!

marjee// don't worry, plenty of thought about baby and milk and sleep.....just need the cooking and crafting to balance it all out or else i'd go madder than i've already grown!

a common thread// doesn't take much - once you start you can't stop!

angie// we laugh so much about addie saying "thats awful/disgusting" to your food that its now a catchphrase in our house.....so of course you dread it when your little people will say that! but your creative solutions are giving us ideas for how we may have to deal with lottie in the future!

catherine// if only i had your food photo skills to take pictures of our creations!

food

2011-04-06T08:19:00.004+10:00

one of the things i miss about being a non-mama is the amount of time we used to spend in the kitchen! we would set aside whole days to make big batches of curry pastes, experiment endlessly with sourdough breads and do what seems now outrageous, things like making pasta from scratch.

bit by bit we are working our way back. i made my first couple of sourdough loaves and am so happy i can easily fit it into our lives again. soooooooo sick of shop bought bread.

also enjoying loads of bits and bobs, such as these oven roasted mushrooms with home-made pesto, pan fried flat beans with garlic, chives and butter with a witlof, nashi and dill salad.

YUM!

outside in

2011-04-01T09:18:00.003+11:00

i dont' know what it is but i most love gardening in the autumn/winter. maybe because you have to do little apart from snail hunting and you have great reward! well, thats how it goes here in melbourne anyway.

autumn is my favourite melbourne season. it makes me want to bring the outside in. love this big picture of leaves from a Dos Visit

looking and listening

2011-03-30T10:16:00.004+11:00

looking at leanne shaptons' month of tuesday blooms and discovered that she does a lot of lovely work.

listening to bill callahan's new album apocalypse

autumnal cleansing of house, garden and mind continues....

stuff

2011-03-28T08:54:00.002+11:00

another lovely family weekend as K had friday off. too busy enjoying it to remember about my camera! had all the good things that constitute a lovely weekend. I even did a morning of WORK for the first time since LP was born and it was great. hope to do a few more little bits and pieces if it works.

also continued to do more de-cluttering, re-organising and taking stuff to the op shop. thinking of imposing some sort of a 'no-buy' pact on myself. not that i spend much money, its just i'm a sucker for op shopping which generally means you bring home stuff you don't really need but just takes up space being beautiful. which has its place, believe me, but i need to get realistic in this new life of ours and its surprising how much space a little baby takes up physically and emotionally!

saved a pip to make a little avocado plant, just like Lotte's pictured above

colours & chats

2011-03-23T06:47:00.001+11:00

COLOURS // seen on yesterdays walk with Lottie Pearl...amazing how far and wide we roam in the pram

CHATS // little existential and observational chats with K, late at night, about what it feels like to be a parent (me: concept of not being my own entity anymore and being inextricably linked to another human k: the giant responsibility of taking care of us girls)

making & doing

2011-03-21T09:21:00.002+11:00

been really getting stuck into some sewing lately. I guess I know I have to appreciate this time where Lottie Pearl is napping loads and isn't all that mobile. So i'm crafting ahead....

yet another great pattern from simple sewing for baby and I delighted in sewing it over a couple of days and made sure I followed it step by step and gave it my best.

quite happy with the results but Lottie's head definitely needs to grow a bit more! Lucky we have a long winter ahead....

party

2011-03-20T08:18:00.004+11:00

i love living in melbourne - but i do hate being away from my sister. i wish i could be there to help with parties - amongst many other things.....imagine all the crafting, op shopping, partying and general frippery we could get up to together if we lived in the same state?

she's having a 70's birthday party and here are a few sources of inspiration i'd use if i had to get together a costume.....

(apologies - small baby inhibited crediting these images....hopefully i can do so later on!)

on my mind

2011-03-20T07:02:00.002+11:00

beautiful orchids in nakameguro, tokyo

japan, you've been on my mind..........you were there for us and turned a tough time into an amazing time.

yesterday was family day and we went opshopping (found some amazing cookbooks!) and went for a walk at a park along the yarra. it was fun to get out just the three of us but we're still learning the ropes when it comes to messing with Lottie Pearl's routine. She was a very tired and mixed up lil bubba when we got home.

We had a bath together last night - what bliss!!! Froggy kicks and loads of smiles...

fruit glut

2011-03-16T07:43:00.002+11:00

i love when there are gluts of certain fruits or vegetables amongst our neighbourhood and friends. that combined aim to find a new recipe for zucchini or the common mission on what new to do with figs? conversation quickly turns to "have you tried making apple butter?"

i've had cucumbers, capsis, zucchinis and cherry tomatoes going gangbusters in my garden so to have armfuls of figs, apples and green beans in return is lovely!

fig jam and fig tea cake were made and shared!

people who don't engage in their garden and life in this way just don't know what they are missing!

good day / tough night

2011-03-15T08:35:00.003+11:00

{new toys i made for LP....from simple sewing for baby}

yesterday was a public holiday so we spent the day pram walking, fig picking, jam making, family napping, cosying, crafting, studying, playing and cooking! but we had a terrible night with Lottie Pearl being incredibly unsettled thanks to an insanely early tooth that is coming through! she is barely three months old! she's always worked to her own schedule.....

and then i wake up and see the horrible pictures coming out of japan and my sleepless night doesn't seem so bad after all. our hearts are with you japan. if we didn't have the responsibility of Lottie Pearl we would be over there to help you recover.

don't know what you've got til it's gone....

2011-03-14T01:15:00.002+11:00

i've been wanting to take a photograph of this silly little window, a few streets over, for 2 years now. i've walked past it countless times and it always appeals to me. i think "i need to take a photo of it" and somehow it always escapes me. yesterday i finally took the photograph.

my uncle john suddenly died on 2 MAR 2011 after falling, hitting his head and sustaining so much brain damage he would never wake by himself again.

i flew back home to be with family and it was a hard, weird and exhausting time. our first time away from K.

all these things lead to yet another reminder to take that photograph, to love that loved one, to appreciate everything before, during and after you have it. life is way too short not to.

xxx

autumn

2011-02-28T08:33:00.003+11:00

dahlias from our early friday morning pram walk

today is the first day of autumn. we have been doing a massive clean-upof things and it feels good. we did lots of cleaning out before Lottie Pearl came along but now she is here we really have an understanding of what things we need and don't need.

finding lots of things we love but no longer use or no longer foresee having the time to use. handing on, gifting and taking to the op-shop....

goodluck to uncle john who is intensive care in an induced coma. he will be having brain scans today and hopefully we recieve good news.

awesome

2011-02-25T19:25:00.002+11:00

incredible crocheted/sewn cube for a baby over at misako mimoko

i'm sure lottie pearl would enjoy one of these! however, i'm currently knitting her daddy some slippers and a beanie

we took a family trip to the national gallery of victoria today and even ate a meal out together! what a treat!

good food day

2011-02-20T20:08:00.001+11:00

what a day of lovely food and company!

breakfast: el joyero cafe (paprika charred corn, chorizo and fried eggs)
lunch: willow, russ, nina and us three (curried pumpkin soup, baked pumpkin, salad and then banana bread with double cream, blueberries and honey!)
dinner: leftover pumpkin soup

burst water pipes

2011-02-18T09:22:00.001+11:00

dear me.

our water pipe burst under the bathroom sink and flooded our bathroom!

had to lay out all of our bits and bobs (deoderants, hair clippers, nail polish, jewellery, first aid kit) on towels to dry out.

what a disaster......

(i found this bow amongst all of the sodden debris.....can't remember where i got this from)

nail polish

2011-02-16T07:32:00.003+11:00

at the moment there are packages left right and centre - all celebrating the arrival of Lottie Pearl! Still! I've gotten to know the mail man quite well!

meanwhile........a little tiny thing called painting your nails makes me feel like not such a drab ole' housewife when sometimes i can't even get out of my pj's!

when my sister visited we spoke about KIT nail polish and what colours we wanted. I have been lusting after a minty sort of pastel green and an orangey, pinky coral. I only have pink and red nailpolish and my sister SCOFFED at my small collection.

might splurge a lil with my pocket money this week!

little human

2011-02-15T15:48:00.003+11:00

as my brother put it so eloquently "she's turning into a little human!"

that she is.....that she is.

orchids and walnuts

2011-02-14T08:25:00.000+11:00

we recieved some beautiful flowers upon the birth of Lottie Pearl - one of which was a white orchid which constantly reminds us of our time in Tokyo.
After nearly 3 months, a couple of the flower heads have dropped off..........

love the sight of.....

2011-02-12T14:50:00.001+11:00

love the sight of fresh washed nappies on the line with our vege patch in the background.

call me crazy but this is the life!

what do you love the sight of?